working

after 11.5 months I finally have a job. But I do question it at times, I still am wishing to get a job in Stockholm, home is there, but my heart's home is elsewhere but hopefully with fate lining up I can be there and my heart will be content.

I really do miss being in Stockholm, I keep dreaming of being there just walking mostly but still I am there in my dreams and that is a piece of clam and home.

so back to the job, I am a product photographer shooting diamonds and genuine gemstones making them look fake like the trend is with the high end jewelers. I dont care for that style at all since it involves a lot of editing and why make it look so fake that when you buy it... its nto the same. A disappointment in my eyes. I did one ad, and the other one got given to the other person they normally out source. Makes no sense why hire me and then dont give me work that I have a degree in.

I am grateful I have a job but I still feel unworthy and useless since I am not being used for my potential, and I know I have allot more to show... but my wings are strapped down and not clipped.

makes no sense.